


But Drunk Did She Get

by icyvanity



Category: Stitchers (TV)
Genre: Alcohol, Camille was a bartender, Everyone is drunk af, F/M, I swear, ONLY RATED M FOR ALCOHOL USE, nothing bad happens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-22
Updated: 2015-08-22
Packaged: 2018-04-16 14:23:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4628577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icyvanity/pseuds/icyvanity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Linus chugged it down like a seasoned frat-boy, looking completely sated. It was only about 2 minutes before he was attempting to re-create the wrecking ball music video with one of Cameron’s kitchen lights, clothed only in his Spiderman boxers.<br/>or<br/>Camille used to be a bartender, and she makes drinks for her friends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	But Drunk Did She Get

**Author's Note:**

> For Stitchers Meet Day 5 ([camsten + alcohol](http://ashlehd.tumblr.com/post/127252454181/stitchersmeet-day-5))

It really shouldn’t be surprising that Camille can drink _everyone_ under the table. Especially since she had warned everyone that she worked her way through grad school by bartending at a club every night, and she was the one in charge of drinks that evening.

Camille had started by asking everyone’s favorite alcoholic beverage.

“Beer is my favorite wine,” Linus had said, grinning like the total bro his drink made him.

“Uh, I don’t know,” Cameron had said, _originally_ , when she asked him before a meeting in the lab. When prompted by threats on his life, however, he confessed his affinity for fruit in his drink.

Kirsten was clearly fine wine, which Camille knew from over a year of sharing a house with her. Her wine was stored on the top shelf of one of their cabinets, perfect place for a giant like Kirsten to reach; not for Camille, who was only about average height even with her usual heels on. So it was time for revenge.

She finally got to use her master drink-making skills after a long day of research, when she offered to make drinks for everyone. Of course they agreed, as they lay in various stages of exhaustion on the living room furniture in Cameron’s apartment.

For Linus, she concocted a tall glass of what actually looked like beer. The twist was that it was actually a tall glass of Grey Goose Vodka, with caramel food coloring. Linus chugged it down like a seasoned frat-boy, looking completely sated. It was only about 2 minutes before he was attempting to re-create the wrecking ball music video with one of Cameron’s kitchen lights, clothed only in his Spiderman boxers.

For Cameron, she brewed some absinthe with berry syrup. While she hadn’t had access to much absinthe during her bartending days, it had recently become legal in the US, so _why not_? Plus, she watched a Buzzfeed video and everyone survived, so Cameron should be fine.

He seemed more suspicious after the Linus incident (person in question was now sleeping in the middle of the floor), but complimented her skills after his first sip. He drank it slower than Linus had, but not slow enough to notice the side effects before it was too late. Halfway through an explanation of the absolute refractory period when he developed cotton mouth. Soon enough his head was in Kirsten’s lap and he was playing with her hair, talking about how shiny it was.

Now Kirsten would have been hard to fool whether she had experienced Linus and Cameron’s reactions or not. But Camille had saved the best for last. She had recently gotten her hands on some Everclear, and had been waiting for the right moment to try it. She mixed it in with some of Kirsten’s favorite wine and gave it to her roommate.

Even considering the strength of the alcohol she had just mixed, Camille still had some doubt that Kirsten would even be affected by it. She already had no sense of time, she was pretty emotionless until she started stitching; it’s not like inability to get drunk was such a reach.

But drunk did she get. Turns out Kirsten has more complex emotions than anyone thought, because she ended up with tears in her eyes and had her head resting on Cameron’s heart for the rest of her waking moments that evening. Cameron was somehow sober enough to comfort her, and they fell asleep wrapped around each other. Camille made herself comfortable on the other sofa and the last thing she heard before she fell asleep was what sounded like Linus accidentally punching himself in the face.

**Author's Note:**

> [Come hang out with me on tumblr](http://lady-gryffindor.tumblr.com)


End file.
